Thursday, March 14, 2013

Blue Toenails for Everyone


So it doesn't take a genius to see that I have completely neglected my poor blog.
I haven't been idle however.
I started a page over on Facebook last month called "A Little Slice of Vintage Life" and have spent quite a bit of my time promoting it and delighting in the fact that my "likes" on the page have marched to over 1000.
But I haven't been here too much.
When I dropped by this morning I noticed that I had once again collected some new followers despite my lack of effort so I thought maybe I should give this a try again.
It's not like the Dynamic Duo has stopped giving me material.

I had just picked them up from Karate and was heading out the driveway on the other end of the complex when Katherine noted the "Foot Massage Parlor" tucked in the back corner.

K: Look Mom, you can get a whole hour's worth of a foot massage there for only $40.

I didn't know how to tell her that I doubted any foot massaging would be going on during said hour.
Our pretty little town, with it's extremely low crime rate and extremely high real estate prices hides a dirty little secret... We have more "Foot Massage Parlors" per capita than anywhere else in the United States. I may be exaggerating a bit but if you drive the boulevard, there is one in almost every strip mall so I bet I am not too far off with my statistics. And I am quite sure we do not also lead the nation in foot fetishes, so I can be pretty confidant that there are other things going on behind the curtained windows beside hot oil treatments and loofah scrubbing.

J: I don't think I'd like to have someone rub my feet, it hurts.
K: Yeah, Gabby kicked the pedicure lady in the face once because she rubbed too hard.
J: See? I told you.
K: Hey can I paint your toenails if I don't rub your feet.
J: Um, I guess so, can I read while you're doing it?
K: Sure, That'll be fun. Let's do it when we get home.
J: OK, but make sure you put on a base coat before you put on the color. Then make sure you put a topcoat on afterwards so it doesn't chip off. And you can't paint them pink, or even red. Do you have blue? (I'd really love to know how he even knows about the proper method of toenail painting, but I kept my mouth shut).
K; Yeah, I'll paint mine blue too, then when we take our shoes off at Karate it will be joke and everyone will laugh because our toenails will match.
J: OK, but remember I get to read while you're doing it.
***Pause***
Me: Jeffrey?
J: Yes?
Me: You don't mind having your nails painted? You don't think anyone will make fun of you?
J: (eye roll): Geez Mom why do I care? It's not like they'll be pink or anything. And it they made fun of me I would ignore them because they are dumb and I don't care what dumb people think.

Well there you have it.

He's been listening to me all this time.
Who would have thought!