All About Me

If certain teenagers (who shall remain nameless) would spend less time moaning about how much work there is left to do and how much they do not want to do it, they would be finished already and I wouldn't have to hear about it anymore. 

Yes, it's confirmed, it's all about me.

Good Morning

Welcome to  Thursday.

 

We've had a "feed me or I'm going to die" cat at 6 AM, 

 

a surly teenage boy at 7 AM 

 

and some cat bio-waste deposited directly between the bedrooms and bathroom which apparently no one saw because "you know I would have cleaned it up of I saw it!" at 8 AM.

 

Perhaps we can tone it down for the rest of the day, what do you think?

 

Song of the Day

Thursday morning tip to the kids (must be sung to be appreciated): 

 

Got a little motto

Always sees me through

When you're good to Mama

Mama's good to you.

There's a lot of favors

I'm prepared to do

You do one for Mama

She'll do one for you.

 

I Have Questions

Can someone please explain to me how my 14 year old can know how to play PS3 with expertise, can help his sister solve computer issues with ease, can navigate the A/C menu to get it to turn on and off at the correct time with ease, but cannot make himself a PB&J sandwich?

Adventures with Jeff

Me (for 10+ minutes): Hic Hic Hic Ouch..... HIC HIC HIC

Jeff: Got the Hiccups?

Me: HIC Good HIC guess HIC.. Ouch these hurt... HIC HIC

Jeff: Did you try some water?

Me: HIC, no, Hic, It never, Hic, Helps..... HIC HIC HIC

I go back to work and then, 2 minutes later:

I hear the LOUDEST, most earth shattering "HEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" delivered at the top of someone's lungs, directed right at me.

I screech and fall off my chair in terror. Quite certain my heart has stopped.

The cat has become airborne as well and rocketed 2 rooms away before stopping to figure out what the Hell happened.

Jeff (calmly): Did that help?

Me (eyes still bulging out of their sockets) I think I died of fright so it doesn't matter anymore.

Jeff (smiling): well I try to help where I can.

(And as much as I hate to admit it, having the crap scared out of you REALLY does get rid of the hiccups.)

A Song for your Friday

We have a neighbor

who lives next door

who has a dog

who likes to bark

from the very first light

to long past dark.

 

(Chorus)

Bark, bark bark bark

(pause)

Bark bark

(pause)

Bark, bark bark bark

(pause)

Bark bark

(pause)

 

And so it goes

night and day

day and night

 

on and on

on and on.

on and on.

 

Truth Poetry

I dedicate this poem about bugs to Katherine:
If it can fly,
It should die.